Significantly, his second marriage was also long and happy.
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I’m not predatory but maybe if I like somebody I will send out a vibe and make eye contact. Toy boys may have no awareness of the mundane tasks of daily living which make a relationship with one almost impos- sible if you have children, especially if those children are still at school.
If that’s being a cougar then label me but I won’t hit on somebody unless I get feedback or they approach me first. If they have been married they have a tendency to be bitter if the marriage didn’t work out, or a bit cynical about women, and the tendency is to bring all that into a new relationship. None of this sounds glamorous but that’s the point.
But neither could I imagine making the effort to negotiate the complexities of my life for someone who didn’t appreciate the other calls upon my time and who is so accepting of my children’s father and his presence in our lives on a thrice- weekly basis.
In his 20s my partner experienced this from the other perspective and was made to feel shut out by his first wife’s new husband.
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Why invest time in a younger man, who will often still be consumed with trying to work out who he is, when you can share it with an older man who can offer the wisdom of his years?
Previously married men tend to have a clearer perspec- tive on life and love.
AT THE age of 42, divorced for a second time and with two teens in tow, I flung myself headlong into the swirling waters of the singles social scene.
Younger men became my choice du soir after a 19-year-old seduced me on a ski trip in the Alps.
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