Why are the “heroes” of the so-called “Black Community” the pimps, the crack dealers, the millionaire wife-beating sports “stars” and rappers, instead of good boys and young black men who take life seriously, and work honestly to build a good life and succeed honestly and legally? Why is a black boy walking home from school with his books under his arm taunted and threatened by gangs for “acting white,” instead of protected and encouraged? And I also hope that my guest on that long-ago night, the gas company Installer, decided that his bond-trader date for the evening, wasn’t of HIS class, and dumped her before she could dump him.
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White men navigate society with relative ease while black women are teetering on the precarious margins of race and gender that they do not have the privilege to ignore.
This is not a game to us, nor is it something we can ignore.
One weekend I held a cocktail party at my very modest apartment for everybody on both sides of the market: customers, clients, and fellow managers alike.
Her date was a good-looking, well-spoken, immaculately groomed and dressed black man of about our own age (early- to mid-thirties at the time).
While white men are not the only group to hold racial biases and stereotypes against black women, they tend to be the least informed on the racialized and gendered issues that black women endure.
White men have the privilege of not having to actively think about their intersections of race and gender, which is starkly different from black women’s realities.
To my shock, she apologized for bringing him as her date. Meaning that, unlike her, he wasn’t a Stanford graduate, didn’t drive a Benz, and wasn’t pulling down a quarter of a million dollars trading bonds.“Jack,” she added as I listened in stunned silence, “a professional black woman like me can’t find a good black man of our own class.